It might feel to you as if getting help from other family members is worse than pulling teeth. Your approach could be what’s making the situation more difficult than it has to be.
Avoid Guilt Altogether.
Guilt can be a powerful tool when you wield it against other family members. But the problem is that guilt can make people defensive and resentful, which are not feelings you want them to associate with you or with your elderly family member. Guilt might help you to get what you want in the short term, but it’s very destructive in the long term. Avoid it whenever you can.
Be Specific and Honest.
If you’re just asking for help in general with no specifics at all, that can be confusing for other family members. You’re likely overwhelmed and feeling raw, but they don’t know what to do for you. Take some time to get clear and specific about what you need and want. Once you have your list, be open and honest with your other family members and give them a chance to help.
Tone of Voice Matters a Lot.
When you’re talking with your other family members, start to notice what your tone of voice is conveying. In many cases, how you’re saying what you’re saying is far more important than what you’re communicating. What happens is that people are responding to your tone of voice rather than listening to your message. Frustration and anger are easy to experience when you’re not getting the help that you need. Don’t let those leak into your communication.
Take a Deep Breath and Seek Help Elsewhere.
At some point, you may find that you’re at a standstill with this process. You’re not budging and they’re not budging, which does no one any good at all. Take a deep breath and look into hiring home care providers. They have the experience to help you in so many ways and you may find that this is a better arrangement overall for everyone concerned. Don’t let a lack of help from other family members keep you locked in a frustrated situation where you’re trying to do everything on your own.
You might also want to just give yourself and your other family members a break on this whole topic. Carry on with caregiving as usual and get help from wherever you can. Later when everyone is feeling a little calmer, the conversations may go far differently than they have in the past.
If you or an loved-one are considering professional home care in Philadelphia, PA, talk to Unlimited Staffing Solutions. Specializing in Home and Community Based Support Waiver Services Since 2001. Please Call Us for Your Home Care Needs (215) 447-713